Listening to what my colleague had to say I couldn’t help but recollect a conversation I had with a friend of mine (female Doctoral candidate) regarding a having a career in academia. We talked about trying to balance family and work and the issue of “is there ever a good time to have children” when you are a female academic? I’ve met several women my age (late 20s early 30s) in academia who felt that it just wasn’t possible to have children before getting tenure. A part of me agrees, because I want to be financially stable before starting a family but also because I’m in the “high output” years of my career right now. It is expected that I’ll be writing articles, chairing committees, and be active in other ways professionally. Are these expectations unreasonable? No not at all. The problem is that in many households women are still expected to bear the brunt of domestic duties. Some people would say that women who are in those types of situations should have chosen a different domestic partner. But the fact of the matter is that a significant portion of society is still sees the world through the lens of Forbes’ infamous “Don’t Marrry Career Women” article. Those who don’t see the world through that lens are still tinted by it.

Meredith uses the word subtle, Dorothea insidious, but both are talking about the same thing, the underpinning that is societal expectations. The little things that Meredith mentions in her post “being talked to like a second grader” by guys in IT, for instance, happen. Everytime it does it sends me for a loop. A part of my feels like I’m on the wrong planet. Because like Dorothea, was raised to believe that the struggle for equality for women was over, that I could expect to be treated fairly, with respect and courtesy. Sometime in high school (probably Calculus class) a part of me realized that it just wasn’t the case. The result is that I find myself regularly trying to reconcile what my parents enstilled: that I could be whatever I wanted to be, with what the society seems to think I should be.

I’m still struggling to understand this disconnect and why it is happening. One great book I read a couple years ago that helped me understand things a bit better was Unlocking the Clubhouse Women in Computing which examined reasons why there continues to be a gender gap in computing. The book tried to tackle the issue from lots of different angles going back to looking at early childhood influences on girls as well as their experiences in college majoring in computer science. If you are really interested in the why piece of the puzzle, I think it is a worthwhile read.

As to how to make things better, I’ve posted before about things I think are important: participate, let other techie female librarians know you are out there, serve on conference planning committees, mentor a new female librarian, help one another on projects, the list goes on. For my own part, I’m excited about working with the other ladies on the Five Weeks to a Social Library project. It is a challenge I’m looking forward to. Plus, I’m hoping to get another personal project off the ground soon, that is if I can find the time.

I, myself, am not without these worries. I was recently asked if I was interested if serving on a planning committee for a certain conference and found myself wondering if I should be more careful exactly what I said about the gender issue in public. Not because of the fact that I’m afraid for my career but that the firestorm that I might create would result in people digging in rather than try to change. Furthermore, I reasoned, this isn’t really what I wanted my blog to be about, at least not overtly (subtly it is sort of me sticking my tongue out at all the guys who say that women can be good at library tech).
Then I got to re-reading the comments and emails that I got on my posts about the issue, looking at who was linking to my posts, and thinking about the conversations I’ve had with people. I realized that, whether they are willing to admit it publicly or not, this is an issue which has meaning for lots of women out there. I’m fortunate enough to never have worked in places were the gender issue was really one of great concern. If someone says something I thought was sexist or sexually harrassing I’m willing to call them on it.  But the issue goes way beyond that. As Dorothea says it is a problem in “communities of practice”. It is also a problem of role models, support networks, and feeling because of the landscape you are doing something that you shouldn’t be doing. That you are the ugly duckling.

This support network issue is one which has always been ever-present for me especially when I worked in a smaller library. One of the happiest moments in my career was when we hired an adjunct libraran at Cortland to so some reference work who had a technology bent. It gave me someone to collaborate with on projects, to learn from and to teach, and to (if I may be so bold) bring along in the career. Not feeling alone or like you don’t belong is very important to making women want to enter and stay in the technical areas of the library profession.
This is one of the main reason why I think that we can’t stay quiet about these issues. As long as we stay quiet and we don’t know who else is out there and as a result we feel alone. By talking, collaborating, and helping each other along the way, we can make a space for ourselves, our own community of practice where we can talk and not feel uncomfortable. That isn’t to say that we should stop participating in other co-ed tech thing or trying to make the things better by advocating for change. It is to say that what we really need is each other.